Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Added August 7th, 2005 by Serenity Now
Introduction:Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is based on one of this year’s funniest flicks staring Johnny Depp. You know, the guy that starred in Edward Scissorhands and the brilliant Pirates of the Caribbean. Yeah, I know, another game based on a high-quality movie. Well, you recall how Batman Begins and Fantastic Four turned out (providing you were a good lad and read my reviews). Take out the comedy, fun, and Johnny Depp, and you’ve got yourself the video game counterpart to Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Continue reading for more information on why you should avoid this contaminated piece of candy at all costs.
Gameplay:
You play as a young boy named Charlie Bucket. It’s every young child’s dream to enter Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory. However, as of recent years, no one has been allowed to tour it, that is, until now. All you have to do is purchase a specially marked candy bar (made with the finest chocolate the world has ever tasted). Randomly selected Wonka Chocolate Bars conceal a golden ticket enabling five lucky children to see for themselves the secrets and magic of the chocolate factory. There’s just one problem for Charlie. He’s a poor boy. His family doesn’t have enough money to cover the daily essentials, let alone a candy bar. Charlie doesn’t give up hope though.
During one ordinary day, Charlie stumbles upon a ten dollar bill. Of course, it being a winter day and all, it was quite windy. You can guess what happens next. Yep, it gets blown away by the wind. Things don’t look too good for Charlie, but being the trooper that he is, he doesn’t give up just yet. He chases down that ten dollar bill, running as fast as he can through the cold, but still no luck. He hasn’t lost sight of it yet though. Well, I’ll give you a hint what happens next. Alright, alright, I know the suspense is killing you. He finally grabs ahold of the money. As stated by the narrator, ten dollars is enough money to feed Charlie’s entire family for a whole week. Charlie, being the thoughtful boy he is only buys one $1.00 candy bar. Well, much to his surprise, Charlie glimpses a flash of gold as he unwraps his bar. He’s a winner! Next thing you know, Charlie, along with four other lucky winners, is off to a once-in-a-lifetime adventure at Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory.
You are now inside the beloved factory. This is when things start to get ugly and annoying. I’ll cut to the chase. The missions aren’t clever, they’re childish. The gameplay is remarkably tedious, and the camera is darn near unmanageable. And do not even get me started on the invisible walls. Hmm, not so happy anymore, are we? Well, you’re not the only one.
Nearly the entire gameplay consists of running around cleaning up the ruin that the spoiled rotten little brats create. Luckily for Charlie, he doesn’t have to put things in order all by his lonesome. Instead, he has an entire squad of merry Oompa-Loompas to help him out. These friendly little helpers will accomplish the tasks that Charlie cannot undertake himself. Actually, Charlie can barely do anything by himself, so you’ll basically be ordering the Oompa-Loompas around the whole game. How fun, ordering around hideous creatures and then watching them perform simple procedures that they actually seem to enjoy doing. Not only is there virtually nothing to do in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, but what you should be carrying out yourself, you have a bunch of Oompa-Loompas doing.
Minor, and I mean minor platforming elements are present here. The little fun this ingredient would have created is exterminated by the unmanageable camera, linear missions, and closed-in environments. The main reason why this game completely fails as a platformer is because it’s so featureless. I mean come on, why can’t we un-invert the camera? I thought I wouldn’t have to see something this disgusting in a current-generation game. It’s not only ridiculous; it’s unheard of, and for good reason. When I found out that I couldn’t un-invert the camera, I almost shut off the game, but I didn’t so I could further inform you about it, and warn you not to purchase it. You’re very welcome.
Graphics:
From an art direction standpoint, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory looks merely decent; from a visual standpoint, it looks well below average. The biggest problem I had with this game’s graphics was its sub-par looking textures. This is supposed to be a colorful game, yet I don’t see any deep vibrant colors, rather I see fuzzy boring ones. Another reason why this game is so appalling is because of its pitiful level design. The environments feel closed-in and uninspired. For such a unique franchise, this was a real shocker to me. I mean, especially since the movie looked so darn good. Unlike the movie though, this title has extremely low production values.
You are now inside the beloved factory. This is when things start to get ugly and annoying. I’ll cut to the chase. The missions aren’t clever, they’re childish. The gameplay is remarkably tedious, and the camera is darn near unmanageable. And do not even get me started on the invisible walls. Hmm, not so happy anymore, are we? Well, you’re not the only one.
Nearly the entire gameplay consists of running around cleaning up the ruin that the spoiled rotten little brats create. Luckily for Charlie, he doesn’t have to put things in order all by his lonesome. Instead, he has an entire squad of merry Oompa-Loompas to help him out. These friendly little helpers will accomplish the tasks that Charlie cannot undertake himself. Actually, Charlie can barely do anything by himself, so you’ll basically be ordering the Oompa-Loompas around the whole game. How fun, ordering around hideous creatures and then watching them perform simple procedures that they actually seem to enjoy doing. Not only is there virtually nothing to do in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, but what you should be carrying out yourself, you have a bunch of Oompa-Loompas doing.
Minor, and I mean minor platforming elements are present here. The little fun this ingredient would have created is exterminated by the unmanageable camera, linear missions, and closed-in environments. The main reason why this game completely fails as a platformer is because it’s so featureless. I mean come on, why can’t we un-invert the camera? I thought I wouldn’t have to see something this disgusting in a current-generation game. It’s not only ridiculous; it’s unheard of, and for good reason. When I found out that I couldn’t un-invert the camera, I almost shut off the game, but I didn’t so I could further inform you about it, and warn you not to purchase it. You’re very welcome.
Graphics:
From an art direction standpoint, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory looks merely decent; from a visual standpoint, it looks well below average. The biggest problem I had with this game’s graphics was its sub-par looking textures. This is supposed to be a colorful game, yet I don’t see any deep vibrant colors, rather I see fuzzy boring ones. Another reason why this game is so appalling is because of its pitiful level design. The environments feel closed-in and uninspired. For such a unique franchise, this was a real shocker to me. I mean, especially since the movie looked so darn good. Unlike the movie though, this title has extremely low production values.
The "enemy’’ design isn’t half-bad, and young children might get a kick out of some of the goofy animations. However, the gameplay is so bad, not to mention the hard to control camera (especially for younger gamers), that they probably won’t be able to focus on the mildly delightful visuals. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is a mediocre looking game at best, but because of the dreadful level design, it falls short of even average. Personally, the graphics were a huge disappoint to me considering what they had to work with.
Audio:
The audio section is about the only thing this game does right. Aside from Johnny Depp withholding his voice talent, the voice-overs are done by the movie cast. But, must I ask, why didn’t Johnny want to lend his voice to this game? It would have helped considerably. It’s all too simple really. He didn’t want to associate himself with this game because, being the intelligent man he is, knew it would be a huge failure. I mean, no way would he want to tarnish his impressive career with this stinker. However, the person (James Taylor) who portrays Willy Wonka actually does a great job. And just incase you’re wondering, no, not the singer named James Taylor.
The music, in my opinion, is much better than the voice-over aspect of this game’s audio. Lovely and charming music frequents Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. It’s quite soothing when trying to become accustomed to the controls. Sound effects and things of that sort are fairly average -- nothing awful, but then again, nothing spectacular.
Controls:
Once again, I won’t beat around the bush. The controls are horrendous. Not necessarily because of the layout, but mainly because there is absolutely no customization options. So, if you don’t like an inverted camera, too bad. You know what though, you don’t have to put up with that BS. Don’t play this game, play a game that allows something this simple, but yet so important. I may sound a little mad, but trust me, if you had to deal with this for around 8 hours, you would be too.
To control your team of Oompa-Loompas, you have to use the D-pad. This is very easy to do, making it a near seamless experience to command them what to do. You don’t need me to tell you this is a child’s game. I mean, the simplistic control layout speaks for itself. Regardless if this is a kid’s game or not though, it’s still, for the most part, a clunky setup, mostly because nothing can be customized, and not everyone likes an inverted camera.
Replay:
Well, let’s see. You’ve only got one mode of play and virtually nothing to unlock. That’s, in all honesty, pretty much it. It can be completed in around 8 hours, or less if you’re over the age of ten. However, I couldn’t imagine someone younger than that completing this game due to the frustrating controls. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is pretty much a lose-lose situation here. Heck, just see the movie, you’ll get much more bang for your buck.
Audio:
The audio section is about the only thing this game does right. Aside from Johnny Depp withholding his voice talent, the voice-overs are done by the movie cast. But, must I ask, why didn’t Johnny want to lend his voice to this game? It would have helped considerably. It’s all too simple really. He didn’t want to associate himself with this game because, being the intelligent man he is, knew it would be a huge failure. I mean, no way would he want to tarnish his impressive career with this stinker. However, the person (James Taylor) who portrays Willy Wonka actually does a great job. And just incase you’re wondering, no, not the singer named James Taylor.
The music, in my opinion, is much better than the voice-over aspect of this game’s audio. Lovely and charming music frequents Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. It’s quite soothing when trying to become accustomed to the controls. Sound effects and things of that sort are fairly average -- nothing awful, but then again, nothing spectacular.
Controls:
Once again, I won’t beat around the bush. The controls are horrendous. Not necessarily because of the layout, but mainly because there is absolutely no customization options. So, if you don’t like an inverted camera, too bad. You know what though, you don’t have to put up with that BS. Don’t play this game, play a game that allows something this simple, but yet so important. I may sound a little mad, but trust me, if you had to deal with this for around 8 hours, you would be too.
To control your team of Oompa-Loompas, you have to use the D-pad. This is very easy to do, making it a near seamless experience to command them what to do. You don’t need me to tell you this is a child’s game. I mean, the simplistic control layout speaks for itself. Regardless if this is a kid’s game or not though, it’s still, for the most part, a clunky setup, mostly because nothing can be customized, and not everyone likes an inverted camera.
Replay:
Well, let’s see. You’ve only got one mode of play and virtually nothing to unlock. That’s, in all honesty, pretty much it. It can be completed in around 8 hours, or less if you’re over the age of ten. However, I couldn’t imagine someone younger than that completing this game due to the frustrating controls. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is pretty much a lose-lose situation here. Heck, just see the movie, you’ll get much more bang for your buck.
Summary:
Yet another quality franchise that would have made a great video game, but turned out sour. Something seriously went wrong in the development process for Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Did they forget to incorporate the option to un-invert the camera, or were they just being incredibly lazy? I’m really curious because something this simple would have helped so much, and it boggles my mind why they wouldn’t put it as a small control option here. Not that it would have made this game purchase worthy though. It’s incredibly short, the gameplay is linear, and the graphics are second-rate. So, what does this title do right? Well, it does have nice music and decent voice-acting. That’s all though, and for the same amount of money this game costs, you could see the movie and buy Psychonauts off eBay. And parents, if your child asks for this game after seeing the movie, and you’re thinking about listening because it was such a good movie, think twice. Your kid may just get a cavity from this game, it’s that bad. Hey, I warned you.
